Episode 9

full
Published on:

26th Aug 2025

9. Trusting Your Creative Flow Beyond Money and Productivity

In this episode of The Bold Brave Woman Project, I explore the weight of that pressure: how it seeps into our creativity, our identities, and even the ways we measure our own worth.

I share my own wrestle with the belief that every project should lead somewhere “profitable,” and the breakthrough that helped me shift out of paralysis and into flow. This simple but powerful separation has permitted me to follow inspiration without drowning it in scarcity, while still supporting my nervous system with practical choices.

If you’ve ever felt torn between your art, your livelihood, and your soul’s calling, this conversation is here to remind you: you get to be both.

Topics Covered

  • How to release the pressure of monetising your creativity too soon
  • The difference between money projects and creative projects (and why both matter)
  • Nervous system safety as a foundation for creative flow
  • Trusting your path when art, identity, and financial realities collide.

Mentioned in this Episode

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LET'S CONNECT

Come say hi on my main Instagram, my new art feed @pathandnine or on Threads.

You can also explore my writing on Substack or discover how we can work together here.

Transcript
Andrea Matthies:

I'm Andrea Lee Matthies, writer, photographer,

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and Clairvoyant Medium, and this

is the Bold, Brave Woman Project.

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This podcast is a living, breathing,

unfolding of what it really

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means to step into our becoming.

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Born from the ashes of a failed YouTube

channel, this weekly podcast brings you

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real unfiltered moments of failure, of

bravery, and of deep intuitive knowing,

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so that you too can step into who you are

becoming with even more trust and bravery.

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Let's dive in.

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Welcome back to another episode

of the Bold, Brave, Woman Project.

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I have been in deep contemplation

this week I've been trying to really

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figure out how I want to bring this

creative energy into my life, into

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how I show up every single day.

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And it's been quite a battle.

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and the reason for that is because

There is this pressure sometimes

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to take the things that we're

interested in, the things that we're

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stepping into, and immediately figure

out how to make money off them.

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Immediately figure out

how to live off them.

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And with this big decision to move

from the energy of pure coach,

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pure entrepreneur, into artist,

it's created so much pressure.

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And I, I didn't realize, but it has

been building so much pressure around,

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well now that I've made this decision

to step into the artist's identity, I

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need to figure out right now in this

moment how I'm gonna monetize it.

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And that has created so much

pressure in my body, more

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pressure than I even realized.

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And it has sent me into a few sort

of thinking spirals, emotional

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spirals, over the last couple of weeks

because it's like, what do I do now?

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Like I can't just, be frivolous with this.

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I can't just flit around and do

art because I want to do art.

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Like there has to be an offer, a package,

something that I, that I do with this

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art that then immediately puts it out

into the world or immediately makes

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money off it so that it's worth my time.

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And it's not even so much

about getting the rent paid.

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And of course that is important and that

is a pressure or a little track that often

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plays in our minds, but, it's about making

the investment of time, of sacrifice,

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of not going and working conventional

job or not doing something else.

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I have to justify spending the time or

taking the time from that into the art

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or into the creativity with something

tangible like an offer or a monetization.

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And this has been swirling around

like crazy in my energy field over

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the last couple of weeks until

about four or five days ago where

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I had a major, major breakthrough.

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And I wanted to share this with you

because you might be in this space

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where you are starting to think about

allowing creativity and allowing that

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inner artist to start to step forward

and step out and perhaps play a more

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tangible and physical role in your life.

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Or it's just something that you've

shut down and now you are willing

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to address, to open, to allow in.

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And you.

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Might find yourself in a similar

position where immediately you're

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trying to monetize it or immediately

you're putting pressure on yourself.

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But there is an alternate way to

approach this, and this is what

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I wanna share with you today.

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So I started to really unpack, okay,

there is pressure, there is conditioning,

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there is justification that my body, my

energy, my soul is feeling like it needs

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to be able to A) claim the artist's title

and B), justify all of the thinking, the

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time, the energy, the experimentation

that my body, my soul, really wants

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to put into this new artist identity.

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There is conflict here,

there's resistance here.

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There's this underlying need

for it to make logical sense.

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And for me to.

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Basically balance the scales.

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And when I really unpacked this,

I, I looked at it as a couple of

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different problems that was going on.

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One, I have chosen the pathway of the

entrepreneur like many of us have or

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many of us want to do, which means

that we need to figure out ways to be

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self-sustaining, or we need to craft

our life in ways where we are not only

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emotionally, but we are financially

supported to undertake these goals.

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So there is a need, there's a physical

need to pay the rent to put food on the

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table, and there is a pressure that builds

around that when that's not being met.

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So that is the first issue.

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It's like there is a physical, tangible

need to be financially stable, but

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in the other camp there is this

craving, there's this soul expansion.

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There is this opening of the senses that

happens when we start to allow the idea of

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the artist of the creative in, we feel it.

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It is like there is so much

more here that I can sense.

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It's in the ether, it's in the

energy, it's in the things that

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I look at that I experience.

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I look at a flower and I feel this

way, or I have an experience with

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someone that sparks something creative,

imaginative a problem that I want to

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solve creatively through these talents.

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There's this whole lot of stuff

that is starting to switch on and

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open within us, but it's slamming up

against this need to be financially

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reliable and financially sensible.

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All these very human words and sentiments

that start to pop up and crop up within us

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that we need to tame or we need to solve.

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And there was also this, um, undercurrent

energy of, can I actually do this?

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Not even from a financial perspective,

but from an art perspective,

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are people gonna embrace my art?

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It's a very outward worry of

what others will say, how I'll

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be judged, how I'll be perceived.

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And so we've got this swirling of all

this stuff going on within us that makes

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it really hard to move forward sometimes.

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Sometimes we can end up in that paralysis

of, well, I don't know what to do.

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Our mind empties, our mind goes blank,

and not in a beautiful meditation emptying

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way in this stress stuck, paralyzed way

of like, well, I can't figure this out.

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This is too much pressure.

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Obviously it's wrong.

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Obviously there's something wrong

with this pathway that I'm choosing,

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or there's something wrong with me.

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And you can end up either in that

paralysis state or you can't even

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go down the pathway of just feeling

worthless, feeling useless, spiraling

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down and outward in terms of, well,

maybe I just need to give this up

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because it's too hard, because my

logical brain just can't figure this out.

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and so when I was waiting through

all of this, particularly over

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the last week around, well,

what do I do with all of this?

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You know, there was that moment

where I was like, just give this up.

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Like this is too hard.

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Just go back, get a corporate job.

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It's so much easier to fall into the

societal norms, the expectations,

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the guarantees, the security.

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we are in a fairly difficult financial

climate at the moment, which adds a lot of

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pressure on us as cost of living going up.

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There's other external pressures that

are happening in the financial world

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that it's so easy for us to just

feel like the safest solution right

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now is for me to abandon it all and

go back to something that's stable,

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that's normal, that's standard.

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And this cropped up for

me in a big way this week.

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I was like, I don't think I'm

strong enough right now with how

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I'm feeling with everything that's

going on to move forward with this.

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I should just go back and get a job.

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It's really interesting because our

body and our energy will always tell

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us what's right and what's wrong from

our, for us, from an energy perspective.

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So as I was searching, you know,

resigned to the fact that that's it,

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you know, this is, there's too much

resistance, there's too much sadness.

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I don't think I can deal with this,

and I'm just scrolling those job boards

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again, and my soul was just feeling empty.

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I was like, ah, everything I talk about

every week, every time I build myself back

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up every week, it's like, no, you know.

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Keep walking the path,

keep moving forward.

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This is going to be okay.

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This is gonna work.

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I know this is a line for me.

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This is what my soul keeps calling

from the ether, from the distance.

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It keeps putting these feelings,

these thoughts of being the

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creative, of moving forward.

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All the experiences that I've had

and I talked about last week with

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the photography sessions and the

new photography mentors how I found

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that going to these experiences.

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And even if they didn't work out the way

that I thought they were going to, they

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were these beautiful, valuable stepping

stones moving forward to who I wanna be.

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And honestly, as you walk backwards,

back down a path that you've

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came from you start to feel that

resistance, that soul nudging that

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soul knowing of like, no, you're

heading in the wrong direction again.

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Like every thing in the ether that's

supporting you is like, we are not

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going to let you walk down this path.

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We're gonna start making the resistance

feel really thick and heavy and sludgy.

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We're gonna send you signs and

symbols that show you you're

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going back down that pathway.

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And because I.

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Have made a commitment to myself

to really tune into those senses,

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to really tune into my body.

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As soon as I started scrolling and

started, you know, getting myself

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ready to apply in that defeated, well

I just have to do this because I have

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to keep the lights on, type energy,

everything got real slow and sludgy.

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You can feel the resistance.

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You can, you can feel the knowing

that this is the wrong direction.

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And so I picked up on that and I was

like, right, okay, alright, I get it.

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I'm not meant to move in that direction.

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I'm gonna make the commitment to

just hold on a little bit longer and

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feel into what is a solution here.

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You know, there's a natural tendency

for us to get onto Google, find

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an expert, and find the strategy

of making the million dollars or

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whatever it is that the goal is.

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It's so tempting to just jump on Google

and Google how to become an artist, or

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the best way is to monetize yourself,

or some other type of strategy.

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It's so easy for us to quickly wanna

Google that and, and get an answer

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and find a logical, proven strategy to

then follow in this kind of feeling of

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safety to get us where we wanted to go.

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And so I kind of started to do that.

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And then I was like, wait, hold up.

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I know for me the answer's not necessarily

in Google because I'm not listening

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to what's actually going on here.

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You know, the, the, the fear

part of my brain wants to get

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onto Google and find the solution

to get me out of this feeling.

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It's like this survival mechanism

of I feel this way quick.

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Can someone just tell me what to do

to solve this, to get me to where

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I wanna be quickly and easily?

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Because I can't cope where I am.

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I can't cope where I'm feeling.

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And this is all valid.

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And don't get me wrong, Googling strategy

can be powerful when it comes from

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strong place of I know what it is that

I'm looking for, and I'm not looking for

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it from a fear or scarcity perspective.

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So what I did is I sat down and

I started to unpack what is it

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that's really going on here?

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What is it that I'm really feeling?

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And through the process of just allowing

my brain to tip out onto the page through

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like just rampage writing, really just

like writing and writing and writing, just

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trying to tip out all of the stuff that

I'm feeling, that pattern of what we're

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talking about started to reveal itself in

that I'd created this internal pressure

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to monetize my art, to figure out,

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If I'm going to be an artist, what

is the offer that I'm going to

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sell someone to validate myself

and make money around this.

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And I had so deeply entangled this

scarcity energy, this fear of not

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being able to pay my bills and survive

with the energy of being a creative.

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And what became very clear for me

is that I actually needed to give

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myself permission to have two separate

buckets of projects of showing up and

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that they didn't have to right now

be intertwined and interconnected.

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And what I mean by this is that I

needed to create and give myself

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permission, a separate bucket

called the creative projects bucket.

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And a second separate bucket, which

was the money projects bucket.

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And as soon as I realized that just having

two separate buckets or two separate

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distinct purpose led intentions in what

I was thinking about and what I was doing

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all of a sudden I realized that the 24

hours in a day or the the waking hours

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that I have in a day, they don't have to

be all mashed together and intertwined to

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try and put pressure on this new identity

that's starting to evolve within me.

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I didn't have to en mesh the two

together to feel justified, to

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feel like I was being successful.

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And by separating out these two buckets,

I'm calling them buckets because that's

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just easier for me to see them as

separate containers that I can pour

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myself in and out of and move between.

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It just allowed me to take this deep

breath of like, huh, I can actually pour

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everything creative, my time, my focus, my

energy into those creative bucket moments.

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And everything about keeping the lights

on, creating money with different focus

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and different energy into the moments

where I'm in the money projects bucket.

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And all of a sudden I

was like, oh my gosh.

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Not only does it give me structure, but

it gives me the permission that when

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I'm in the artist's energy to be in it.

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To be fully in it, to be fully present.

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And then when I'm in the money

bucket moments, I can be focused.

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I can be tenacious, I can be, In that

space of like, okay, what am I gonna

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do that allows me to keep the lights

on and what does that look like?

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Really create that for myself

without feeling like I'm giving

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up on my artist self or without

feeling like I've sacrificed my

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creative self just to make money.

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And honestly, it has been life

changing over the last probably

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four or five days since making this

decision because now I can, when I

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wake up in the morning, I can choose.

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I'm like, Ooh, today

feels like a money day.

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Like I really tune into my body and into

my sacral, and I'm like, today feels

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like a day where my logic's online.

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My body's in this place of like,

right, let's solve this money problem.

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Let's look at the money projects.

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Let's do those things.

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Versus waking up in the morning

and being like, Ooh, I feel

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really tuned into the ether today.

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I've got some creative ideas flowing.

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I just, I feel like I really wanna

be behind the tools of the camera

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or the paintbrush, or whatever it

is that's coming through that day.

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I'm like, well, this is the energy

that I wanna step into, and giving

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myself the freedom and flexibility

to flow between those two things

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has made such a big difference.

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So when I was sitting down to

think about these two buckets.

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I wanted to set a really clear intention

at the top, what each of them were for.

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And so when I really felt into this

creative projects bucket, I was like,

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These are the projects that I really

wanna have to build my skills, build my

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artist skills, push the boundaries of

who I am as an artist, and really help

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me develop those skills, develop my

identity, build a portfolio, something

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that I can pour my time and my energy

into that I'm proud of, that's creative,

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that's building without having to have

the pressure of, I need to build this

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portfolio to show either a creative agency

or a client or whatever to monetize.

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It's like, no, I wanna build this

portfolio of work that really

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exemplifies my flavor, my taste,

my my view of the world through the

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lens of the artist, and start to

gather and collect this portfolio.

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And I wanna have projects in here that

help me find my flow, like help me find

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that moment where I'm in connection

with the universe, with my team, with

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my energy, with my visions as an artist,

and just allow that to channel through.

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Because up until this point,

if I'm honest, my flow has been

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very academic, very strategic,

very masculine based energies.

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And so these creative projects are

about helping me find this new flow, And

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giving myself permission to take these

classes without the pressure of that,

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well, I have to immediately monetize if

I'm gonna do this photography course.

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because I have given myself permission

to have a separate money projects bucket.

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Really making that empowered choice

of feeling financially supported in a

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way that is aligned right now without

putting the pressure on my creative

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self And I put a lot of really deep

thought into this over the last few

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days around what would feel really good.

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And I was actually listening to a class

that was being run by the beautiful

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Melanie Ann Layer of Alpha Femme

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she made this beautiful point, which

really stuck with me, that said, "if

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you wanna make money, go and get a job.

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If you wanna serve the world.

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Start a business.

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And, this really struck a chord in me

because this notion of starting a business

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to make money can get really entangled

because all of a sudden we can get into

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that space of looking at our clients

or looking at people that we're selling

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things to as the person responsible for

keeping our lights on or putting the food

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on the table, And she was like, you cannot

run a business from an energy like that.

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She's like, if you're in a space where

your nervous system is fried and you're

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worried about putting money on the

table, she's like, go and get a job.

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Like let a job fill that component

and then allow the work that you

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do in the world be for the people.

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And of course, when we show up with

intentions like that, the money

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finds us, the money flows in when

we are actually showing up to serve.

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And so I was really sitting with this

over the weekend and I'm like, this is

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why I don't wanna monetize my creative

projects yet, because I don't wanna look

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at the people that I'm serving through

my photography or from my writing from

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a desperate lens of, I need you to

sign on and work with me because I need

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to keep the lights on or pay the rent

this week, or pay the rent this month.

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I didn't wanna do that.

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And so I sat with it deeply and I was

like, what would feel really fulfilling

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for me and my nervous system and where

I'm at right now in really embracing

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this new creative flow that I wanna open?

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What would the money project, the

keeping the lights on projects look like?

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And actually I've decided that I

wanna go out and take a couple of

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part-time summer jobs, like the

weather is going to get better here.

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And I have been working by myself

from home, working from home in my

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business now for four years, and

I'm realizing I'm missing people.

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And so I've actually got in

my money bucket to go out and

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find some fun summer jobs.

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And you know, this is a big thing actually

to get to sometimes, particularly if

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we've decided to be a creative or be

an entrepreneur or break out and do

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our own thing, we can see any form of

going back into employment as failure.

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And I say this because this is

something that I have lived deeply.

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There has been many times where I've

felt like, I can't go back into the

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corporate world or employment of any kind.

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because I failed.

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It means that I tried to be an

entrepreneur, but I didn't make it like

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I had to go back to safety, and there

was this huge overwhelming sense of

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failure that was attached to that within

me and within my body that it put me

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into a state of paralysis of like, well,

I cannot go back and work for someone

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because it signals to the world, and I'll

feel embarrassed that I didn't make it.

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That I tried something and

I was a big fat failure.

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Like that is how it felt.

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And it was so heavy and so overwhelming

in my body that I've had to do so

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much work to say, going back and

making choices, like going back into

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the employment world or going back

into a part-time job, and I'll, I'll

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explain more about this in a moment.

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It's not failure.

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It's an empowered choice that

we get to make and we can find.

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We can choose to find safety however we

want to find safety, but it doesn't have

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to be from a scarce fear-based energy.

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And I'm realizing because I'm approaching

this now from a very different energy

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of like, oh no, I'm not giving up

on my free spirited, entrepreneurial

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going to do big things in this

world energy because my creative

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projects bucket has got that covered.

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I wanna just go and get a few fun

summer jobs so that I can just

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tell my nervous system that I don't

need to stress out all the time.

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Particularly when you take your

business back down to zero or you

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quit your full-time job and you're

starting your art, or whatever it is

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in the shift that you're making, maybe

you're coming through a health crisis.

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When you've gone back down to that zero

place, even if it was your choice, your

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nervous system can get fried because

you're like, how am I gonna survive?

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How am I gonna keep the rent

or the mortgage, or whatever

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situation that you're in?

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Like, how do I keep that going?

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And your nervous system can

sometimes feel like it's always on.

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:

And that's what I was realizing,

um, up until recently, is that my

338

:

nervous system was constantly playing

at max capacity and I was exhausted.

339

:

I was breaking down in tears constantly.

340

:

Like I was just constantly on a

roller rollercoaster, emotionally.

341

:

And it was purely because the situations

and this pathway that I had walked myself

342

:

down meant that my nervous system was

operating at the high level to try and

343

:

keep me stable and to keep me surviving.

344

:

And the beautiful thing is, is that I

don't regret that because it's got me

345

:

to this point, but I'm realizing that

I can just support my nervous system

346

:

by going out and doing something fun

that isn't tied to my identity, that

347

:

isn't tied to this label of failure.

348

:

I'm just gonna go out and find something,

probably creative, maybe aligned to

349

:

where I wanna go, but low stakes, fun,

cool people hanging out, being in the

350

:

wellbeing in life so that I can gather

these beautiful moments of inspiration to

351

:

pour into those creative projects bucket.

352

:

So at the moment in this money

projects bucket, I've got like, just

353

:

finding something fun for the summer.

354

:

And the beautiful thing about this too

is I've sort of said to myself, well,

355

:

we're in, you know, late August now,

I'll, you know, just say that I'm going

356

:

to do this until early next year, till

the end of summer, maybe March, April.

357

:

Next year.

358

:

'cause we tend to have

late heat here, right?

359

:

It still can be quite hot in March.

360

:

So I was like, yeah, March, April,

maybe my birthday next year, which

361

:

is April, I'm just gonna pick up

some fun stuff with this beautiful

362

:

space of like, well, anything could

take off between now and then.

363

:

Anything can shift.

364

:

I'm just gonna be fluid.

365

:

Who knows?

366

:

The photography stuff might pick up

sooner than I expect, but at least I

367

:

know it's something I'm choosing to do.

368

:

It's something fun, I've recoded

it so it no longer means failure.

369

:

I'm still choosing it.

370

:

So therefore I'm in control of it.

371

:

And it gets to be fun.

372

:

It gets to be what I want it to be,

and I can leave it at any time that

373

:

I choose because I'm choosing myself.

374

:

And so having this slightly different

mindset around money projects,

375

:

creative projects, is really helping

me because now I know that on

376

:

those days where I wake up and I'm

like, today's a money projects day.

377

:

I can spend time, um, applying

for stuff and it actually

378

:

not have a story behind it.

379

:

And some of the other things in my

money projects is this pro podcast.

380

:

And even although this podcast isn't

monetized, and that's a choice that I've

381

:

made right now, this is something that

is important to me, is something that's

382

:

growing my voice, my ability to speak.

383

:

whilst it does have some veins

of creativity, this podcast is

384

:

something that's really important

to me that's moving me in the

385

:

direction that I wanna go.

386

:

So I've got this podcast in

that money projects bucket.

387

:

So in that energy of like showing up

and moving forward, I'm like, right,

388

:

podcast editing, recording social media.

389

:

You know, it's a slightly different

energy, but it feels, it helps me

390

:

feel like I'm moving towards really

supporting my nervous system in that way.

391

:

Um, my accounting, like getting

the finances in order and doing

392

:

the accounting, getting my emails

out there about the podcast,

393

:

about these other things is also

in that money projects bucket.

394

:

And this other thing that I've decided

is that as a coach and having worked

395

:

with hundreds of women and as a

strategist and all the things that

396

:

I've done to date, there are some

marketable skills that I have right now.

397

:

And there are some things that I

can immediately offer the world.

398

:

And so I've said to myself in this

money projects bucket, I'm gonna just

399

:

put together one little tiny offer

400

:

And what I've decided to do is just offer

readings because I have this incredible

401

:

skillset as a psychic medium, as a

channeler, to be able to really support

402

:

people, particularly when it comes to,

embracing their identity, recoding all

403

:

the fear that comes around, changing

their direction, their career, their

404

:

stepping from one identity into the other.

405

:

And I can channel to really help

unblock and unpack and make it a

406

:

little bit easier to make those shifts.

407

:

So I thought I'm just gonna

offer simple opportunity to

408

:

work with me in the capacity of

just one-off channeled readings.

409

:

And that feels really good in my body

because it's something that's in service.

410

:

It's something that I know I have

an incredible track record with lots

411

:

of case studies and testimonials.

412

:

And it's something that I love to

do and I can do it from this new

413

:

energy of the artist because I have

this whole new part of me that's

414

:

switched on now that I can serve.

415

:

Not just from a strategist

perspective, but also now from

416

:

the creative artist's perspective.

417

:

And I love to work with women.

418

:

I love to work with trans individuals,

with queer folks, to really help in that

419

:

transition of identity, of finding self.

420

:

I'm gonna start offering that.

421

:

And so if you're listening

and you're like, this is for

422

:

me, definitely reach out.

423

:

I'll pop a link app at some point so that

you can book, but I've decided that I,

424

:

I don't have to have this big coaching

business to be able to offer something,

425

:

real and small and powerful like this.

426

:

And I can then pop it in that money

project bucket so I can spend time

427

:

crafting that without feeling the pressure

of, oh, I've abandoned my artist self.

428

:

Because what I'm really discovering

in this process of separating things

429

:

out like this is that we wanna put

ourselves into one defined box.

430

:

We wanna say, well, if I've

claimed that I'm an artist, that

431

:

I can only do artist things.

432

:

Or if I've claimed that I'm a coach,

I could only show up and do coach

433

:

things, or if I'm in this field

or this, this particular identity,

434

:

then I can only do this things.

435

:

And that's crazy.

436

:

Like there's so much diversity within

us as individuals that if we can set up

437

:

these beautiful structures, and for me,

like at the moment, it's two buckets, but

438

:

you might have a couple of things there

that you're like, well, I'm this, but I'm

439

:

also this and I'm this, and I'm also this.

440

:

And I don't have to pick a lane.

441

:

I don't have to just pick one thing

and I don't have to make every single

442

:

thing interconnected and intertwined.

443

:

And if you've got a strategic brain

like mine, this is something that can

444

:

trip us up a little bit because you

wanna say, well, I'm multi-passionate,

445

:

or I've multiple interests

446

:

But I should find a golden

thread that connects them all to

447

:

justify having multiple things.

448

:

They all have to all be in a nice,

neat package so that I can show it

449

:

to the world and be like, here I am.

450

:

See how all these things connect and see

how they all also support my lifestyle

451

:

through money or financial gain.

452

:

Like here's the neat package.

453

:

And sometimes that neat package

actually is impossible to create.

454

:

And this is the thing that

I've learned the hard way.

455

:

I've always wanted to try and golden

thread, connect every single thing

456

:

together so that it makes sense from

the outside and also makes sense from

457

:

an intellectual mind perspective.

458

:

But I'm realizing that I'm

actually more than, things that

459

:

I can connect together neatly.

460

:

I get to actually move

fluidly through things.

461

:

Eventually they might find merging

pathways and they might merge together

462

:

for a little while and then separate,

but I get to be all of these things.

463

:

I don't have to pick a lane.

464

:

I don't have to neatly package every

single thing together, and I get

465

:

to move fluidly between the things.

466

:

And if people don't understand

that, it doesn't matter.

467

:

The world's not even really asking for it.

468

:

I've created the construct in my

mind that I need to please them.

469

:

Most of the time, they're just focused

on their own stuff and they don't

470

:

really care, So I'm done with having

to try and put everything always neatly

471

:

together and connected and make sense

and intellectualize every single thing

472

:

to please a world that's probably not

even really asking me to please them.

473

:

That's how I see it.

474

:

And so that's where I'm like drawing a

line in the sand and being like, for me

475

:

right now, having creative bucket and a

money bucket makes sense, I'm gonna do it.

476

:

'cause it feels good.

477

:

It's good for my nervous system.

478

:

Today I've woken up.

479

:

It's Monday and I'm like,

today's a money bucket day.

480

:

I just feel it.

481

:

Whereas yesterday I was

like, today's a creative day.

482

:

Like just trust your intuition

when you wake up, you'll know.

483

:

And as soon as you know, just follow it.

484

:

I was like, right.

485

:

Today I wanna get up.

486

:

I'm wanna record the podcast,

'cause that's in Money Bucket day.

487

:

I'm gonna go look at some cool stuff

to maybe apply for later today.

488

:

I'll get the little mini offer

of the readings up if anyone

489

:

wants to start booking them.

490

:

And that feels good now because

I don't have to worry today that,

491

:

oh, I haven't done any photography.

492

:

Oh my gosh, I'm failing as an artist.

493

:

Oh, what?

494

:

I haven't done anything from my dreams

of being blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

495

:

Like, I haven't done that.

496

:

It's like, no, it's cool because I'm

giving myself permission and trusting

497

:

that today is a money bucket day.

498

:

And that's cool.

499

:

And tomorrow if I wake up and it's a

creative day, I'll trust that that's cool.

500

:

And I'll trust that I've done enough

today in the money arena that doing

501

:

stuff for creative tomorrow is enough.

502

:

And this is the key part, is the trust.

503

:

I know we've talked about trust a

lot, but everything keeps coming

504

:

back to this notion of trust.

505

:

Trust that you know deeply inside,

underneath the fear, underneath

506

:

the scarcity, underneath the worry.

507

:

You know what you're doing.

508

:

You know you're being led.

509

:

Trust that when things unfold

on your pathway, it's because

510

:

they're meant to unfold.

511

:

The universe never misses you.

512

:

Things that you are meant to

achieve, things that you're

513

:

meant to do, they won't miss you.

514

:

You can't go through life and

miss the things that you are meant

515

:

to be doing and things that your

soul is meant to be experiencing.

516

:

It doesn't work like that.

517

:

Everything that is destined for you

to experience, to grow through it

518

:

will find you in one way or the other.

519

:

And if you miss it, it'll come back

around and it'll find you again.

520

:

And so when you do wake up and feel

like, ah, my head wants to tell

521

:

me it's this kind of day, but my

body and my gut and my energy is

522

:

telling me it's this kind of day.

523

:

Just say to yourself, I

trust, I trust my body.

524

:

I trust my knowing.

525

:

I trust my intuition.

526

:

It does not let me down.

527

:

And even if the decision creates

a situation that isn't favorable,

528

:

it's because it was meant to.

529

:

I trust.

530

:

I trust, I trust, I trust.

531

:

And that you can also sometimes

have a switch in the day, right?

532

:

You might wake up and be like,

today feels like a money bucket

533

:

day, or whatever your buckets are.

534

:

And you might do what you need to

do until lunchtime and then be like,

535

:

Hmm, I feel the creative energy.

536

:

Or I feel the other

bucket energy flaring up.

537

:

Now I'm gonna trust that this

feeling is raising for a reason.

538

:

I'm gonna pivot and I'm

gonna go down that pathway.

539

:

And so you can move through

different energies in different days.

540

:

The way I work, I like to know that

I have a whole day, a whole 24 hours

541

:

or the waking hours within 24 hours to

pour into something with an intention.

542

:

That's how I work.

543

:

But you might move more

fluidly through that.

544

:

But one important thing that I do

wanna get into, and I, hinted to this

545

:

earlier, is that we can find ourselves

consciously and deliberately choosing

546

:

to ignore certain buckets and only give

attention to the ones that feel more

547

:

fun or mean that we don't have to face

certain hard feelings or hard realities.

548

:

And we can worry that if

we create buckets and we.

549

:

Move into this mechanism of trusting

or intuitively being guided that

550

:

we're only gonna choose the fun stuff

and we're gonna let ourselves down.

551

:

Like that can be a legitimate

fear, and that can also be a

552

:

legitimate situation that comes up.

553

:

Here's what I say to that, your

soul, you are deep inner knowing.

554

:

Your energy, your intrinsicness of who

you are, knows when that's happening.

555

:

You know, when you are deliberately

getting into the energy of avoidance or

556

:

scarcity or fear, like there are different

feelings, vibrations, frequencies that

557

:

you intrinsically can pick up on when

you know you're avoiding something

558

:

because it feels different Choosing to

be in your creative bucket for the day.

559

:

From a, well, I just don't wanna

deal with the money stuff, or I don't

560

:

wanna deal with the reality stuff.

561

:

I just wanna play in the fun

stuff feels very different.

562

:

The avoidant energy feels very

different to the, I know I'm being

563

:

led and I'm excited and I'm buzzing,

and I just wanna do this perspective.

564

:

It feels different, as does.

565

:

I only want to feel buzzy and excited,

so I only want to choose the creative

566

:

stuff because the money stuff or the

real life stuff or whatever the other

567

:

buckets are with whatever labels that

you have, it feels too hard, too heavy.

568

:

It feels different, and so this is where

you need to be brave enough to face that.

569

:

If you are finding yourself constantly

waking up and you're like, I only

570

:

wanna do the creative artist fun

stuff today because the other

571

:

stuff is just too hard, too heavy.

572

:

I don't wanna feel, I don't wanna

feel it, I don't wanna know it.

573

:

I just want the universe to

solve the problem and manifest me

574

:

completely financial free life, and

I don't wanna have to deal with it.

575

:

You have to be brave enough to.

576

:

Almost interrogate that and be

like, why am I feeling that way?

577

:

Why am I avoiding it?

578

:

Why is it so hard?

579

:

Because through that beautiful

interrogation, iss probably too

580

:

harsh of a word, but through that

beautiful inquiry, self-inquiry,

581

:

you can find what's really going on.

582

:

Like for me, avoiding applying for any

kind of employment that wasn't self-led

583

:

or entrepreneurship for myself, it's

like, oh, it's because I feel like the

584

:

world's gonna call me a failure if I

go back into any form of employment.

585

:

That's interesting.

586

:

I can work with that.

587

:

I can recode that and I can choose

to let that go, or can choose to

588

:

tell myself a different story,

which is exactly what happened.

589

:

I choose to not let

that be a story anymore.

590

:

I was like, why?

591

:

Why am I letting this story of the

world dictating that employment

592

:

equals failure to be a thing?

593

:

Like that's a construct that I've created.

594

:

I'm gonna let that go.

595

:

And so through that gentle inquiry

of something that you're avoiding, if

596

:

you find, if you set up your buckets

and you find like, I'm only doing this

597

:

thing all the time through self-inquiry,

you can be like, well, why is that?

598

:

And you can discover some of the

most amazing stuff that leads

599

:

to incredible breakthroughs and

incredible change for yourself.

600

:

And all of a sudden you'll

find things become easier.

601

:

Or maybe your buckets even change and

morph or a new identity reveals itself.

602

:

Like the ether and beyond

is not even the limit.

603

:

Like everything is possible when we

choose to face the avoidance, when we

604

:

choose to really understand why we are

executing behaviors in the way that we

605

:

are, then that's when we can change them.

606

:

So if you've got an identity that

you're toying with, if you're in a

607

:

crossroads, if you're crossing over

from one thing to another, or you're

608

:

starting to feel like where you are

is not where you're meant to be.

609

:

Allowing yourself to start exploring

these different facets of yourself and

610

:

potentially creating these different

buckets can just change the game.

611

:

And even if you can't see it,

sense it, know it right now.

612

:

So much is unfolding, so much is coming.

613

:

And if you feel like you want to get a

reading from me, please do reach out.

614

:

These are just gonna be

simple, straightforward.

615

:

I'm gonna have a really accessible

pricing structure as well, because I

616

:

just, honestly, if there is information

in the ether that is meant to find

617

:

you, and I can do that for you by

being the channel for that information,

618

:

that is enough for me right now.

619

:

So if you are curious or you're feeling

the pull to get a reading or to work

620

:

with me to step you forward into this new

chapter, these through channel guidance

621

:

reach out or send you the link to book.

622

:

And of course, anytime you wanna reach

out about anything else, I am here.

623

:

I love being here.

624

:

I love having these

conversations with you.

625

:

And I'll see you in our next episode.

626

:

As always, thank you for being here.

627

:

If this episode stirred something for you

and you wanna book a channeled reading,

628

:

jump on the link in the show notes.

629

:

There's only a few channel reading

sessions available each week.

630

:

And of course you can reach

out to me anytime on my main

631

:

Instagram handle @andi.matthies,

632

:

or follow all of my art and photography

on my art feed @pathandnine on Instagram.

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About the Podcast

The Bold Brave Woman Project
Welcome to the Bold Brave Woman Project. I’m Andrea Lee Matthies — writer, photographer, and clairvoyant medium — and this show is a living, breathing unfolding of what it means to become.

Born from the ashes of a failed YouTube channel, this weekly podcast brings you raw, unfiltered moments of failure, bravery, and deep intuitive knowing — so you can walk your own path of becoming with greater trust, courage, and clarity.

Follow along at andreamatthies.substack.com and on Threads & Instagram @andi.matthies for all the episode extras and behind-the-scenes reflections.
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About your host

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Andrea Lee Matthies

Andrea Lee Matthies is a writer, photographer, and clairvoyant medium devoted to the raw, real, and radiant journey of becoming. With a background in performance, creative media, voice, and intuitive healing, she creates spaces where truth can rise and women can return to the power of who they are.

Her work blends storytelling, soul transmission, and spiritual insight, supporting women to reclaim their voice and navigate the challenges that come with the journey of self-discovery. Through her camera, her words, and her presence, Andrea invites deep connection, brave expression, and sacred transformation.

The Bold Brave Woman Project is her offering to the world: a living archive of what it means to fall apart, rise again, and trust the becoming.