Episode 8

full
Published on:

19th Aug 2025

8. How to Keep Going When It Feels Like Nothing Is Changing

Some days it feels like nothing is shifting - your bank account looks the same, the room you wake up in hasn’t changed, and the brave steps you’ve taken don’t yet show in your outer world. But this doesn't mean things aren't changing.

In this episode, I open up about those moments of doubt, the pull to return to what feels safe, and what it takes to keep going when everything feels like it's not working.

Topics Covered

  • How to keep believing in yourself when reality looks unchanged
  • The difference between fear-based pushing and soul-aligned bravery
  • Navigating doubt, exhaustion, and the pull of safety versus expansion
  • Seeing challenges and opportunities as portals into your next becoming

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Transcript
Andrea Matthies:

I'm Andrea Lee Matthies, writer, photographer,

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and Clairvoyant Medium, and this

is the Bold, Brave Woman Project.

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This podcast is a living, breathing,

unfolding of what it really

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means to step into our becoming.

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Born from the ashes of a failed YouTube

channel, this weekly podcast brings you

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real unfiltered moments of failure, of

bravery, and of deep intuitive knowing,

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so that you too can step into who you are

becoming with even more trust and bravery.

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Let's dive in.

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Welcome back to another episode

of the Bold, brave Woman Project.

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Today I wanna talk about.

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How to keep the faith in yourself and

what you are moving towards, even when

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things feel like they're not progressing.

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And the reason I wanna talk about

this is, this is something that's

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been cropping up for me a little bit

lately, especially with all of these.

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Big dreams and ambitions that are starting

to awaken within me, and I'm starting to

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take steps towards this new creative and

photographic and new version of myself.

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But some days I wake up and

I look around and I think.

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Everything looks exactly the same as

it did yesterday, as it did last week.

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Is this really working?

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And the answer is always, yes.

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Yes it is.

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And sometimes the progress

that is happening for us is

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something that we can't see.

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Even although we are making the moves,

we're making the steps, we're doing the

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inner work, we're progressing, and the

reality isn't necessarily changing around

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us that we can see through our eyes or

experience with our senses just yet.

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But there's a whole.

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Invisible field of energy,

of quantum reality.

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That is shifting, that is changing,

especially when we're doing the inner

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work to change who we are and how

we're stepping up into this reality

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that quantum field is changing even

though we can't see it, and it is.

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so that the work and the world that we're

really craving for can come to fruition.

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Now, this can be really, really

challenging and this is something

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that I've sat with a lot this week

because it is so easy to fall into the

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old trap, the old conditioning, the

old emotion that I'm still stuck or.

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I'm not moving forward, particularly in

society when we have this construct called

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Time and we have this whole process that's

going on within our body that is aging.

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There are some days where I wake up and

I'm like, oh, I've just spent another

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week working on this thing, yet I don't

have anything tangible yet to show for it.

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Or, you know, I'm, I'm another.

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Six months, 12 months older, have I

really progressed in the way that I.

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Thought I should or that I

thought I would, or am I achieving

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the things according to what a

42-year-old should have achieved

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or have or do by now and this age.

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This time, construct can really,

if you let it run away with you and

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your mind just goes down these rabbit

holes, and sometimes you can end up

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in that place of despair of like.

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Well, no I'm not and I should have

had this and I should have had that.

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And we get into this should mindset

and all of a sudden we are just

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feeling that sense of lack and we

are feeling that sense of I'm a

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failure or I'm not where I should be.

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Nothing is working.

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And we end up in that negative

spiral all, and we all know what

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happens when that spiral takes hold.

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We end up back into that

place of nothing's working.

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what am I doing this for?

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and that type of thinking is what actually

puts us back into energetic stasis.

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It's not that we can't see the things

that are unfolding, they're not the

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things that are creating the stasis.

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It's this thinking.

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That we are not progressing because

it's like slamming the gates down

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on any progress, any abundance

that's flowing through to us, it

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just closes that off immediately.

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the question then becomes.

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How do we stay motivated and

connected to the greater vision,

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connected to ourselves, to who we're

becoming in those moments when it

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feels like nothing is progressing?

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And what I think is the key here.

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Is to create the vision so big

and so bright and so brave for

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ourselves, that continues to reignite

this passion, this spark, this

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motivation to keep stepping forward.

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I'm gonna be really honest.

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There are still days where I wake up

and I'm like, what on earth am I doing

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like this journey of entrepreneurship,

of creativity, of being an artist,

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and particularly starting new in a

creative field like photography, like

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essentially I'm having to start at

the bottom because I never studied

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photography when I was in school.

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You know, I, I've waited until my

40th years to decide to pick up a

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camera and to decide to reawaken all

of this need to express and to see

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and to translate beauty in the world.

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And there are moments, particularly

this week, 'cause it's been quite

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a big week, where I've woken up and

I'm like, what on earth am I doing?

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Like just.

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Go and get a job in the corporate

world again, like go back to the safe,

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go back to the familiar, lean back

on all of the strategic skills that

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you have, like just make all of this

stop, essentially, this doubt, this

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questioning, this, having to wake up and

keep pushing, keep making brave moves.

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Like just stop it and go

back to where it's safe.

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That thought has crossed my mind

more times than I like to count.

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But here's the thing.

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I made a commitment to myself, as

I'm sure you did too, to be a bold,

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brave woman who forges a path, who

does what she really wants to do.

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What is sitting in the base of her soul

that is calling to her to at least.

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Try to acknowledge to walk forward.

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That calling is the thing that keeps

stirring within me in those moments

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where I'm like, just make this stop.

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Just go back and get a job.

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Just go back into the corporate world,

back into that high level where you

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don't have to worry about income.

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Everything's taken care of.

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Someone tells you what to do when

you show up at work every day.

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You do it.

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You go home, you take your holidays.

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Life is grand.

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But here's the thing.

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That dialogue of life is grand is just

a scarcity, safety craving mechanism and

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conditioning in my brain that isn't real

because I can guarantee you, and you might

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know this within your soul too, that if

you go back to that familiar or that safe

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construct that is old and just exists

within your mind, you'll get one week.

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One month, six months.

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It's usually not even that long down

the track of going back into the old,

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and you'll be like, what have I done?

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And I know this for myself.

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I'd be there and I'd be

like, what have I done?

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Like I just gave up on everything

in those moments that it was hard.

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Those moments where I couldn't see

the tangible translation in my reality

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of the things that I was building

because I was afraid to hold on.

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I didn't think I was strong enough

to just to hold on, to keep stepping

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forward, and now I'm back in a reality.

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Like I can feel the emotion coming

up as I'm saying this because I know

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this is exactly what would happen.

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I've put myself back into this corporate

reality or back into this safe quote

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unquote reality, but it's not what I want.

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Yeah, it might be safe.

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I might be having a regular paycheck

come in, but really, is that enough?

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and knowing that that money is there when,

of course society demands income expenses.

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We've got increased living costs

going on right now, but is just

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having that safety of going back into

this old paradigm of that paycheck

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enough to really fulfill my soul.

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This is a legitimate question that I

will be asking, and I know myself so

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well that in that moment that I'm asking

myself that question and I'm feeling

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the constriction, or I'm feeling the

shaving of who I am off to fit back

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into that corporate box just to exist.

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I'll be asking that hard question

of why did I abandon myself?

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Like, is this worth it is.

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Having to exist within this reality

of, yes, financial safety, but

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unhappiness of everything else,

is that truly and deeply better?

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Then holding on in terms of finding

my bravery, allowing my quantum

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reality to match my current reality

of the life that I wanna have.

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Is it worth it?

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That will be a question

that I will have to face.

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And having been someone that has gone back

into the corporate world, back into the

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safety net of a job in so many different

careers, having transitioned from so

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many different careers, I know what the

answer will be and the answer will be.

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I wish I had trusted myself enough to

follow what my soul was telling me to do.

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I wish I had given myself the support

to breathe, to know that even on

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those mornings when I wake up and

the current reality, like the, the

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place that I'm still living and

the bank account that I still see.

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I wish I'd given it enough time

and enough trust to catch up with

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who I know myself to truly be.

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I wish I'd held on long enough.

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I know that is exactly what I'll say,

and that is the reason why in these

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moments when it feels like nothing

is working, when it feels like you

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haven't progressed and you're stuck,

you're still in the old paradigm.

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It's why I know that it's

important for me to hold on and

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this is the big important key.

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Sometimes these fears feel like truth.

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They're so used to being

translated in our bodies as truth.

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These fears that we think they're

real, that we are like, well,

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of course I have to go back.

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Or, of course I'm unsafe because

this fear has been here so long.

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It's part of me.

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the voice gets so familiar

that it feels real.

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But there's a big difference between

feeling real and actually being true,

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like being the truth of your soul and

listening to those fears as we do,

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and then acting from that place of

contraction, of fear, of scarcity.

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It has the power to knock us

completely off the trajectory

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that we're meant to be on.

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I know for me.

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Being brave and continually choosing

bravery, continually choosing trust.

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That is part of this journey, and

I choose to do that for as long

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as it takes, and that scares the

hell out of me Most of the time.

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I'm like, what am I doing this for?

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Especially on the days where I'm tired

or I'm exhausted, when I'm tired, it's

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so easy for those old fears and that old

scarcity to just creep in and take over.

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I think in the last episode I shared

that I was meeting this brand new

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photography mentor for the first time.

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I was just heading out

to have lunch with her.

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And I did and it was amazing.

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She's incredible.

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We had this beautiful chat and coffee

and she agreed to mentor me and a couple

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of days later I went along to a shoot

that she was doing a boudoir shoot in her

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brand new studio that she's just set up

and spent the whole day with her setting

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up the set Photographing and working with

the model, and then right through the

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process of editing the photos, doing all

the adjustments right to the final cut.

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And it was incredible.

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I fully acknowledge this is an experience

that we don't normally get and.

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I'm just so grateful that I sent

that cold email to ask her for

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this mentorship because it, it

completely changed everything

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for me in that being on that set.

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There was a part of me that was

awake, that was alive, that was like.

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this is where I wanna be.

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This is what I wanna do.

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Like working one-on-one in this intimate

setting, really reaching into, the

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depths of their soul to reawaken their

passion, their power, their sexuality,

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and expressing that through the camera.

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it set my soul on fire.

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I got home that night, And I felt amazing.

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But the next day, I woke up and was all

over the map emotionally, and I was so

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confused because I was like, how can I

come off the back of such an empowered

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day, such a, knowing state of this is

what I want and this is what I wanna

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move into, to waking up the next day

feeling like exhausted and overwhelmed,

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I was like, what is this energy?

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And I sat with it for a little bit.

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and I was like, what is going on here?

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And what was happening was this quantum

stretch, I'd found another beautiful part

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of my soul journey that was unfolding.

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But all of a sudden, all of my

doubt, all of my scarcity, all of

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my worry was on board and it was

just completely exhausting myself.

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I didn't realize I had this, unconscious

undercurrent of what if, what if going on?

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Like, what if I can't afford it?

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What if, what if, what if?

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And it overnight and during the morning

had just completely depleted me that I had

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gone from this massive high down into the.

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Well, how and what, and am I good enough?

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And all of this kind of like just

clumpy type energy and emotion that

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just brought me all the way down.

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And the other thing that I decided to do,

which in hindsight, perhaps a little bit

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of a mistake, but I thought, oh, well, now

that I am wanting to go on this beautiful

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Trajectory of going down the pathway of

photography and really embracing this

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stuff and becoming a master at, at my

skills in this space, I'm gonna do my

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finances and my accounting, my end of

financial year stuff to, you know, just

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put everything in this beautiful space

of cleanliness so that when I start

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to embrace this new passion and what

whatever path this takes me on, the

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abundance is coming into a clean slate.

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And Oh my goodness, Through a process of

like looking at financial stuff, which,

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you know, when you're an entrepreneur, it,

there's highs and lows in our businesses.

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There's peaks and troughs, and

sometimes those troughs get really,

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really loud and the doubt comes in.

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And so I just compounded all

of these feelings of doubt of.

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Well, you know, I'm not a

millionaire yet, so what's the point?

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Is any of this working?

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It's like, oh my goodness, I got to the

end of trying to get all my finances

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done this day, and I was an absolute

wreck and a mess and had convinced

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myself that everything was impossible.

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Uh, nothing was gonna turn

around and I should just.

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Forget it all And the rollercoaster

of this emotion is so, so intense.

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The next day I did some clearing

work and some grounding work.

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I'm like, no, you know, this is great.

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I've got this opportunity.

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There's a reason why

this was brought to me.

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Like keep coming back to if

something gets put on your path.

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If a door opens, if an idea sparks

and takes flight, there's a reason.

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That's not random.

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I never believe in it being random.

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It is timing and it is

energetic intention.

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And if there's something that

we are meant to be doing, the

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universe will put us on that path.

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And there's a reason for that.

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There's a learning, there's an

expansion, there's a do a door

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opening or a new identity that's

about to be burst or come through.

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We have to trust that.

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And so I was like, no.

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Okay.

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There's a reason for this.

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So I parked, I got the financial stuff.

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You know, to the point where

I can now hand it over to

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an accountant, even though.

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It wasn't a fun process, but

I thought right now I'm gonna

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go down to my brother-in-laws.

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'cause he said he is got some more

camera gear, some more things that

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I can borrow because I am going to

book this incredible shoot on Sunday.

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It was a portfolio building shoot.

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I'm gonna book in even though I know

I'm not ready, I'm gonna book into this

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professional studio based portfolio shoot.

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And it was a fantasy shoot.

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I'm gonna do it on Sunday because

I really wanna make this happen.

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And even though I'm terrified, even,

although I am questioning everything

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and I know on paper I'm not ready,

I need to just keep diving in.

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I need to keep being brave.

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I need to keep making

these moves to make this.

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Not make, but like allow this

dream to continue to unfold, to

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allow the trust to build in myself.

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And the only way to build trust is

for us to make these big, bold moves.

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And so I paid the investment to go to

this shoot on Sunday and I thought,

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right, well I need to go and get

more camera gear just because like

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I'm starting with nothing really.

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Just this borrowed stuff from

my beautiful brother-in-law.

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I drove down, you know, it's

like a two hour drive each way.

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Drove down to their farm and got

to spend some time with them.

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Picked up the camera gear, brought it

all back, like drove all the way back.

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Um, this was Friday by this point,

and the shoot was on a Sunday.

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Talk about tight timelines, but

sometimes we just gotta do it right.

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So I got all the way back.

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My husband, he was visiting with

his father, so I had the house to

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myself and I pulled all the gear out

and I just started playing with it.

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And I was already exhausted because

I, I had burnt through so much

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adrenaline and anticipation for a.

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You know, meeting the new mentor and

then going on the shoot and then doing

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all the accounting, like I could feel my

reserves of energy starting to deplete.

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So I'm already starting to feel that

tiredness creep in, but I thought

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this is important to me, so I'm

gonna push just a little bit more.

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And so I sat up late after I got back

from the country just playing the

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gear and learning the settings on the

camera and all this type of stuff.

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And by the time I went to bed.

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By like 10, 30, 11, I was like,

oh, this is starting to click.

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Like, you know, actually, when I had

done the shoot with the photographer on

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the Wednesday with the boudoir model, we

actually reviewed some of my photos and

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we could see a whole bunch of errors that

I'd made technically with the camera, but.

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There was some feedback from her that

said, you know, my composition is good.

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And so that was a tiny little spark

of like, okay, there's something here.

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It wasn't all a waste, and so I could

see by this night after I'd finished

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with the camera gear, I'm like, Ooh,

I'm starting to feel a little more in

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tuned with, with the gear, with the tech.

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You know, there's this

little spark of hope.

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so I went to sleep with this

little like injection of like,

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okay, I think I can do this.

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I think I can do this.

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Just another iota of trust that I could

bring into my body, into my energy

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field, knowing that what I'm moving

towards is something that is here for

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me, something that I'm meant to be doing.

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So just went to sleep with

that, holding that in my body.

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And I woke up the next day completely

exhausted and I knew I had to still go and

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sort out some extra camera gear and lenses

to be able to do this shoot on Sunday.

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So my husband and I drove around a

few camera stores and a few bits and

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pieces, and I was an absolute zombie.

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And here's, here is one thing that

I will say is that sometimes that

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we can push, push, push beyond.

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Uh, the energy limitations of our physical

body, and we have to be careful of that.

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There's a difference between.

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Being abundant and moving with the

energy and being bold, Andre being brave.

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And then there's the energy of

ignoring what we need and doing

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it from a, I'm gonna push because.

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I've convinced myself that I have

to push, that I should push that

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I am worthless if I don't push.

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I am a failure if I don't push.

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And this is a really dangerous energy to

get into because there is moving in the

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directions of our dreams and being bold

and being brave without that scarcity,

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fear-based driver behind the pushing.

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so by Saturday lunchtime, I was

starting to feel the difference between

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the brave moves and the fear-based

pushing moves, and I had to say to my

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husband, I'm like, I need to just stop.

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I need to just spend the rest of the

day just chilling, just doing some

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meditation, maybe watching a movie,

having a bath, whatever, I need to make

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this conscious choice right now in this

moment to switch from the, I have to

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go get these lenses and get everything

perfect and ready for the shoot on Sunday,

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because otherwise I'm gonna be a failure.

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I could feel that buzz

starting to happen in my body.

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I need to go back and Just check out

and do something, chill and relaxing

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for the rest of the afternoon, because

otherwise I'm gonna charge straight

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into this photo shoot on Sunday.

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From a scarce energy, and I could

already feel that anxiety build

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in my body and start to peak.

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And we don't wanna do stuff in a state

of anxiety because there is so much

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energy that we can tap into that can

ground us, that can bring us back to

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this wholeness, this calmness, this sense

of peace, and then move through bold

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moves through bravery with this grounded

whole power versus the rattled scarce,

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running around anxious type energy.

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And if you can start to notice a

difference in your body when you are

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wanting to do this big, bold, brave

stuff, just really tapping in and saying,

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is this coming from a grounded, plugged

in source fueled type bravery move?

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Or is this being fueled

from an anxious real?

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Physical, adrenal type, anxious

energy of I have to get this

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done also, I'm going to fail.

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If you can start to sense those two

different energy currents and then

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make the powerful choice to trust

and switch from one or the other,

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it makes a complete difference.

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So by the time I got to the last kind

of camera store thing that we had

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to do on Saturday, I just said to my

husband, I need to just disconnect.

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And so I came home.

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I laid down, I did a meditation,

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But I'm gonna be honest,

I didn't quite nail it.

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And that's why I really wanted

to raise this with you, to start

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bringing consciousness around

where we are sourcing energy from.

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:

Because I still, even although I

laid down, did meditation, I at

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some point had decided that this

portfolio shoot on Sunday was

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the make and break of my career.

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Like, that is just such

a crazy thing to decide.

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This is a portfolio shoot that I

had chosen to invest in to gain

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access to a studio with some fantasy

based sets and models to take

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photographs to put in my portfolio.

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And I had somehow made the decision

that if I didn't do a good job at this

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portfolio, I was a failure A failure

as a photographer, a failure as an

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entrepreneur, a failure as a woman,

and a human, and a soul on this planet.

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Like that is a crazy thing to

decide out of nowhere, but this

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:

is what we do all of the time.

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You might be listening to this and think

of like, yeah, I know I do this too.

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Like there's this thing that I really

know in my soul that I wanna do, or

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I wanna achieve or I wanna have, and

we create these arbitrary rules and

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milestones that we determine are make

or break, and it's just not true.

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And I started to feel this anxiety raise

up within me on Sunday morning as I was

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getting ready to leave for the shoot.

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And I, it started to

feel like panic stations.

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I'm like, I don't have the equipment.

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I've still gotta go pick up this lens

that I've bought to have for the shoot.

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:

And my bags getting

heavy and my hands sore.

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:

And like I could start to feel this.

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It's like a cog in your brain that starts

to spin up really, really fast with all of

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this chat, and I had to just like ground.

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I went and had to shower.

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I love showers.

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Showers are incredible for using

the water to just wash anything

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:

that is attached to you physically,

anything that's in your energy field.

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:

To just allow the shower

to just cleanse it.

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:

So I went and had a shower, washed

my hair, and it was just like,

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:

there is no make or break here.

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:

This is just a beautiful

opportunity for me to expand.

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This doesn't determine

the rest of my life.

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:

This is just a learning experience.

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:

This is just another bold move that

I'm choosing to make for feedback,

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:

for learning, for expansion,

in whatever way that it's meant

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:

to expand me in this moment.

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:

And as soon as I started to reframe it.

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:

It made all the difference.

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:

All of a sudden it became this portal of

opportunity for me to step through rather

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:

than the be all and end all of this is

gonna define me for the rest of my life.

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:

And this can be applied to so many

things, which is the beauty of it.

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:

Every time that you start to feel yourself

creating this massive narrative, this

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:

pressure to have either achieved something

or gained something out of something that

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:

you're about to do or compare yourself

and feel like nothing is shifting.

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:

You can just see things as these

beautiful portals that are opening up to

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:

be able to step you through to the next

thing that you're meant to experience.

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:

The next thing that you're

meant to learn or expand into.

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:

And trusting that these

portals will continue to open

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:

even if we can't see them.

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:

So this morning when I woke up and

I started to feel those tentacles of

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:

despair creep into my mind of like, well,

I'm still waking up in the same room.

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:

If I check my bank account, I'm sure

it's still the same as it was yesterday.

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:

It's like, yes, but I have passed

through so many portals this week

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:

that are changing things behind

the scenes that are changing things

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:

within my body, within my braveness,

within my ability to manage my anxiety

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:

when I'm trying to make bold moves.

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:

I know that my physical reality

will start to catch up because

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:

it's impossible for it to not.

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:

We can't make fundamental changes

in our energy in who we are and

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:

what we are doing, without the

physical reality catching up.

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:

That's just how energy works.

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:

So if you are having that moment of

despair of, well, I'm this age and I

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:

haven't achieved this, or I am doing

all this stuff and it's not changing, or

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:

I'm still just an anxious mess, feeling

like I need to go back to the safe.

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:

Just know that every

time you choose yourself.

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:

Every time you choose to ground,

to come back to your energy to pass

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:

through another energetic portal, even

although it's invisible, even although

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:

you can't see it, you are changing.

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:

Your world is changing, and your

reality will start to catch up.

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:

And don't forget you're never alone.

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:

Anytime.

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:

Reach out to me.

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:

I'm here.

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:

I would love to hear about the

bold moves that you're making, the

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:

portals that you're passing through.

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:

And to celebrate with you because

every time you choose your

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:

bravery is another massive step

forward in who you are becoming.

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:

I love you and I'll see

you in the next episode.

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:

Thank you so much for

tuning into today's episode.

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:

If you wanna check out all of the

behind the scenes content for this

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:

podcast, make sure you subscribe to my

Substack channel, the Becoming Archive.

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:

You will also be able to find me on

Threads and Instagram at andi.matthies.

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:

Make sure you're connected and

stay up to date with what's coming.

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About the Podcast

The Bold Brave Woman Project
Welcome to the Bold Brave Woman Project. I’m Andrea Lee Matthies — writer, photographer, and clairvoyant medium — and this show is a living, breathing unfolding of what it means to become.

Born from the ashes of a failed YouTube channel, this weekly podcast brings you raw, unfiltered moments of failure, bravery, and deep intuitive knowing — so you can walk your own path of becoming with greater trust, courage, and clarity.

Follow along at andreamatthies.substack.com and on Threads & Instagram @andi.matthies for all the episode extras and behind-the-scenes reflections.
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About your host

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Andrea Lee Matthies

Andrea Lee Matthies is a writer, photographer, and clairvoyant medium devoted to the raw, real, and radiant journey of becoming. With a background in performance, creative media, voice, and intuitive healing, she creates spaces where truth can rise and women can return to the power of who they are.

Her work blends storytelling, soul transmission, and spiritual insight, supporting women to reclaim their voice and navigate the challenges that come with the journey of self-discovery. Through her camera, her words, and her presence, Andrea invites deep connection, brave expression, and sacred transformation.

The Bold Brave Woman Project is her offering to the world: a living archive of what it means to fall apart, rise again, and trust the becoming.